The darkest timeline is upon us. The Penguins are 2016 Stanley Cup Champs, and Sid won the Conn Smythe. I mean yes I hate the Pens because I am a Flyers fan, and I hate Crosby because he is so damn good (and a little baby), but the 2016 Pens seemed to annoy me WAY less than previous years. I think Phil Kessel helped with that, ya simply can’t hate that guy. Good for him, screw you Leafs. Also screw team USA for leaving him off the squad in the world cup, I guess they just don’t want to score.
Here is what I said about the Pens heading into the season:
The big news from the 2015 offseason was the Phil Kessel trade. The Penguins received RW Phil Kessel, LW Tyler Biggs, D Tim Erixon, Conditional 2nd-rd pick from the Maple Leafs for RW Kasperi Kapanen, D Scott Harrington, C Nick Spaling, Conditional 1st-rd pick, 2016 3rd-rd pick. Now everyone thinks they are going to be raising the cup. I’d rather not get ahead of myself. Don’t get me wrong, a prospective line of Kessel, Crosby and Malkin is pretty much unfair to every other team in the NHL, BUT the Penguins still have Marc-Andre Fleury between the pipes, and they still have the almost the same D core. They’ve added Adam Glendening on D and forwards Nick Bonino and Eric Fehr as the summer has rolled along. That should round out their bottom six quite nicely, I still don’t think it makes them a lock for the cup. For the Pens to even make it past the first round of the playoffs they will have to avoid the Rangers and Flyers (unlikely PHI will threaten) and Crosby will have to show up and provide more of an impact on the postseason.
Prediction: Second round exit from the playoffs
Clearly I am a big stupid idiot. Other than writing Bonino’s name in that sentence above I had NO CLUE who that guy was, but now everyone does (“pay that man his money”). Clutch HBK Line, Matt Murray, the Pens had a lot of things break well for them, but they also were the most dominant team in hockey for the last 2.5 months. So Congrats Pens, I hope you miss the playoffs next year.
On the other side of the coin we have the Sharks. Good on them for proving everyone wrong and actually beating the LA Kings for once. Other than that the Sharks don’t really have an impact on my feelings. Good to see Logan Couture and Martin Jones get some love though, interesting storylines to follow for next season.
The World Cup is happening next season WOOO!! I wish I could go but I don’t have 4K to shell out for tix. I’m not confident that the game times and TV coverage will be optimum so I am only like 75% hype about it. ALSO let’s be real, Canada is STACKED, who is gonna beat them? I am claiming my allegiance right now to team North America because they have Shayne GOATSthiebere and Connor McDavid who I guess is good.
Other things from this past season:
- Ovi and the Caps ran into the red hot Pens and lost, confirming that they are still chokers but are they really? I hope he wins one soon.
- Steven Stamkos is likely leaving Tampa, he will be the biggest free agent I think I have ever seen in my lifetime
- Jonathan Drouin ties Phil Kessel for the ultimate troll award. After requesting a trade and refusing to play, he gets called back up in the playoffs and DOMINATES.
- Dollar Shave club should send Brent Burns like a million razors.
- Connor McDavid is AMAZING, so is Jack Eichel
- Vegas is getting a team! Which means next offseason is gonna be awesome.
- Trade Deadline sucked AS ALWAYS (please take Jeff Mareks suggestion and lock all the GM’s in a room for a day)
- I liked the coaches challenge, everyone else hated it.
- NHL please call enterprise and discover and get some new commercials
July 1 is right around the corner!!